Mommy Musings Monday-teaching kids hygiene

Toilets not flushed. Underwear streaked. Teeth not brushed. Fights at bath-time. Dirty hands at dinner.

It is life as a mom.

One of the responsibilities you have as a parent is to teach your children proper hygiene. It is something that you tackle young and hope that your children "get it" by the time they start school and you unleash them, and their dirty ways on the world.  Unfortunately it doesn't always work that way. It appears that reteaching and relearning is a daily process. We are doing that right now. There has been an influx of unflushed toilets, dirty underwear, teeth so gross they have grown orange gunk...need I go on?

The question comes on how do you drive home to older children that this is important stuff? That is the challenge that now faces our household.  We have tried reminders. We have tried punishments. Nothing has worked. Last week we stumbled onto something though.

James is a horrible teeth brusher. Just bad. Kids have come up to him at the store and said "you're teeth look gross." and they were right. He told us he was brushing every day and we believed him. We thought the discolored teeth came from a fall he had a few years ago that seemed to loosen some teeth but not enough to pull them out. Then came the day in May when I realized James had been lying. He hadn't brushed his teeth in over a month. He didn't know where his tooth brush was and had just been going into the bathroom during teeth brushing time, turning his timer over, and waiting. When we found out there was the dreaded punishment of dad brushing the teeth. We watched him like a hawk and found he was no better at teeth brushing and there were more times of dad brushings. He went to the dentist last week and our hygienist painted his teeth to show them how bad they really were. It was bad, but it shocked James enough that he was scared what would happen to his teeth. So far so good. over a week later he has pearly white teeth and is flossing- all because he got scared.

So tonight we are having a Family Home Evening Lesson about hygiene. We are going to talk about what happens to you body if you don't wipe well. Or if you don't wash your hands. It is going to be the scare tactic.

I don't know if it will work, but it is worth a try. I guess all we can do is hope.

What way do you teach your kids about good hygiene?

Mommy brain karma

Before I got married I was always very shocked by the absent minded mothers I met. I was surprised that they couldn't remember very simple things. I mean how could you forget your child's name or the glasses sitting on top of your head?  I could (and still can) rattle off high school friends birth dates and phone numbers. My memory was nearly flawless and I was proud of that and knew that when I became a mother that I would never have problems like this.

Yeah, ever heard of something called karma?

It all started during my pregnancy. I started forgetting my student's names. Names that I had memorized and not forgotten the first week of school. I chalked it up to the fact that I was tired all the time. Little did I know that was just the start.

I have lost bottles, only to find them in the sink where they belong ten minutes later. I have misplaced credit cards, to find them sitting my wallet. Yeah mommy brain has sunk in. It has only seemed to grow worse in the past few weeks. Let me give you a few examples all from this month.

I attended my neighborhood cooking group the other night. I had an enjoyable time and when it was time to go I picked up my few dishes and said goodnight. I walked across the street to my car and loaded the dishes in the back. As I sat in the drivers seat I put the key in the ignition and turned. The car didn't start and the wheel seemed to lock. I adjusted the wheel and tried again, still no purring engine. I went on with this game for five minutes. It was then I started to notice little things. Like the fact that my breast cancer pink ribbon didn't hand from the mirror.  James' name card had disappeared from the dash board and the car seemed much cleaner than I remembered it being.  I turned around and there was clincher the back seat was empty, missing two carseats. Yes, I had gotten into the wrong car. In my defense the car was also s silver CR-V parked near feet from mine.

Later that same week I was calling a new babysitter and leaving our phone number to call back and I forgot the number. Me. I can remember every phone number I have ever had. I remember every work number I have had. I remember friends from elementary school numbers. But there my mind went blank. My message sounded something like this: "Hi, this is Natalie Bradley from the ward. We need a babysitter on Thursday. You can reach me at 801....um. um. I think I just forgot my number. Um call me on my cell at" you get the picture. I had to ask my nine year old four times that day what our home number was because I plain old didn't know.

One last moment of mommy brain karma happened two weeks ago, about a week after the first two incidents. We had been at a birthday celebration at my parents and had finally rounded up the kids and were on our way home, this was of course after twenty minutes of trying to cajole the kids out the door. We were strapped in and had left. Half way down the street I hear from the back seat, "Hey where is Eve?" Sure enough our six year old was no where to be found. She was still playing with her cousin, blissfully unaware that she was the latest victim of mommy brain.

Thanks karma. Thanks.

Mom's chore chart

 Growing up both Christian and I had to do chores. This is something that we both feel was beneficial to us and something that would be beneficial to our kids so our kids have chore charts. Each day they have to do chores around the house like cleaning their rooms, making beds, sweeping the kitchen, cleaning the bathroom sinks, sorting laundry, and in one particular case eating their dinner in under 45 minutes.

The kids earn stickers on the chart or frowny faces, depending on if they did their chores or not. At the end of the week they can turn those stickers in for beads and turn those beads in for prizes or money. It is a great system. But see a few months ago we had a break down. There was crying and yelling and "mom doesn't have to do any chores."  I just had to laugh at that and then we decided to show the kids that mom does do chores. This may not have been the best parenting decision that I have ever made but that next Sunday my chore chart went on the fridge next to theirs. Instead of being one page long mine was four pages long.

  It included things like: make bed, laundry, clean breakfast dishes, feed baby, errands,  make lunch, pick up kids from preschool, take kids to kung fu, etc. There were a total of 36 jobs on the chart and I was really careful to make sure to do all of them. At the end of the week I earned over 200 beads and I think the lesson was learned. We haven't heard any more "mom doesn't have to do chores" and everyone else seems to do all their chores.  So it may not have been my most stellar moment as a parent but it seemed to work.

In fact the other day I had just finished the morning routine of getting everyone up, fed, and out the door when I turned to James and said, "James being a mom is a hard job."  "I know" he answered. "How do you know?"  "I watch you."  

That boy is going to make someone a great husband one day.

Holding my baby close

I got some distressing news today, a cousin's six-month-old baby had a brain tumor removed last night. He is currently recovering and his parents and family are anxiously waiting tests.

Since I heard that news today it has put so much in perspective. My kids are often crazy. Yelling and screaming at each other. Running amok and destroying the once clean house. Complaining about what food is made, what chores need to be done, or what movie to watch. Often I am driven to frustration or chocolate with these four crazy monkeys. But here is the thing, they are healthy. I don't need to watch any of them suffer and be helpless to help them. I am so grateful tonight for that gift. I am grateful for the house that can't stay clean, for the loud laughter and crazy yelling. Though I am not so grateful for the fighting but I am grateful that they are here to fight. I am holding them close tonight. And I am praying for the quick recovery for a baby in Denver tonight. May he quickly regain his smiles and his cheery demeanor.